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‘Every Breath You Take’ is actually terrifying
- Mar 13
- 7 min read
Every Breath You Take is possibly the most misinterpreted song ever. You probably already know that Every Breath You Take is not a love song - it’s actually about stalking.
If you didn’t know that, you’ll love the rest of this article, if you DID know that - you might NOT have known that Sting wrote it about his dying marriage. And while he was watching his marriage fall apart, The Police were falling apart too — and this song would become both their biggest hit and one of the reasons they broke up.
The Police emerged in the late 70s, and by the mid-80s they were known around the world. Their lineup consisted of Sting (real name Gordon Sumner), Andy Summers and Stewart Copeland. Sting was the primary songwriter, and their sound was an eclectic mix of punk and reggae. From that came songs like Roxanne:
This track is about a man who falls in love with a sex worker, so it's clear from the start that Sting didn’t shy away from controversial themes in his song writing. In the next few years, The Police continued to grow a fanbase with massive songs like Message in a Bottle.
The Police would borrow the arpeggiated 9th chord style from this song for Every Breath You Take.
Now, fast forward to 1982, and the band were working on their 5th studio album, Synchronicity. But things behind the scenes were not so good.
This was partly due to the personal situation Sting had found himself in. That year, he and his wife, Frances Tomelty, had separated. And with good reason.
Sting had an affair with Tomelty’s friend, Trudie Styler. Yeah, you can see why she might have been a bit annoyed by that.
This had caused a bit of a stir, and in order to get away from it all, Sting fled to Jamaica. Funnily enough, the place he was staying was the same place that Ian Flemming wrote some of the Bond novels. Perhaps that world of crime and danger influenced his thinking, because at that same desk he wrote Every Breath You Take. The track came to him very quickly, allegedly about half an hour.
At first, Sting felt as though he had written a beautiful love song about the breakup of his marriage, but he later realised there was something a lot darker to it. A bit, uh… stalker-y, you might say.
To be fair to him, Sting has never shied away from the darkness of this track. While in some ways it is a love song, it demonstrates the worst side of love; the obsessive, compulsive side. He told International Music and Recording World in 1995:
"That song is about surveillance and ownership, possession, jealousy; emotions that we all have."
And of course all of that was inspired by his marriage ending. He’s writing about himself, not some other character. It’s about the possessive, "sinister" feelings he felt about his wife. The feeling of wanting to keep her under surveillance the feeling of wanting to … no other word for it really, stalk her… A breakup can do crazy things to someone’s head.
Now the breakdown of his marriage was not the only thing that this song corresponded with. The breakdown of his band was also on the horizon. Unknown to him at the time, Synchronicity would be The Police’s last studio album.
After Sting’s Jamaica get-away, he came back to London to record a very simple demo of the song.
The whole band then met at Air Studios on the island of Montserrat to record it, as well as some other songs for the album.
This session would sadly not be fun in the sun. Oh no. It was actually quite traumatic, and it's where a lot of the tensions that the band had been feeling came to a head. In particular the tension between Sting and Stewart Copeland were making things virtually unmanageable.
Their producer for the album was Hugh Padgham - he was rather in demand after producing Peter Gabriel’s third album, Phil Collins first solo album and he was the man who had discovered the famous 80s gated reverb drum sound. This project wasn’t so smooth sailing though.
Padgham told Sound on Sound in 2004:
"By the time of Synchronicity, they were sick of each other – Sting and Stewart hated each other, and although Andy didn't show as much venom, he could be quite grumpy – and there were both verbal and physical fights in the studio.”
Things were looking pretty bleak.
An example of this tension can be found in the drum part of the song. Sting wanted a simple, straightforward drum rhythm with no fills. The complete opposite of what Stewart Copeland (who was the drummer it should be said) wanted to do - he wanted to make it his own with lots of character.
This would cause heated back and forth throughout the whole process. It was this tension that would eventually lead to the band’s break up in the mid 80s.
It got so bad that Hugh called his manager to tell him he couldn’t handle it. The tension was through the roof and they’d worked full-on for 10 days without anything usable on tape… It was a disaster.
One thing was certain though; Every Breath You Take was destined to be a hit. From listening to Sting’s demo, everyone knew it would be a big song so the pressure was on for Padgham to wrangle the band members and somehow transform this demo into an instant classic.
According to Summer, the song was close to being thrown out - mainly because of Sting’s and Stewart’s constant disagreements.
It wasn’t until Andy Summers stepped in that things started to take shape.
The making of "Every Breath You Take" was a total nightmare, especially over the drums. Sting wanted this super-simple, no-frills beat, which was the exact opposite of what drummer Stewart Copeland was trying to do—he wanted something with real character.
That basic disagreement led to some seriously intense arguments while they were recording, which was basically a preview of why the band eventually broke up in the mid-80s. Things got so bad that at one point, Hugh actually called his manager, completely stressed out after ten days of work that hadn't produced a single usable thing. It was, by all accounts, a massive disaster.
Even with all the drama, the song's potential was obvious; everyone knew Sting's demo was a guaranteed smash hit. That put huge pressure on Padgham to wrangle the band members and turn that demo into a timeless classic.
Andy Summers said they almost just gave up on the song because of all the constant fighting between Sting and Copeland. It wasn't until Summers stepped in that the recording finally started to come together.
According to him, he went in and completely smashed the guitar part in one take.
Whether that’s true or not, it’s got to be said that Summers is the unsung hero of this song - he really made it the great song it is.
So, despite the gruelling process, the result was a track that would not only define their career, but would also represent the end of it.
Every Breath You Take was released as a single in 1983, and it became a mega mega mega hit.
It reached No. 1 in multiple countries, including the UK and the US. In fact, it went on to win a Grammy for ‘Song of the Year’ in 1984. It has since won awards for the sheer amount of air play it has received. Some sources say it is the most played song on American radio ever.
But like I said, many didn’t see this track as sinister; they saw it as a beautiful love song. It became popular at weddings, people would approach sting in the street and say every breath was my first dance song - not knowing what it was actually about… you see? Very misunderstood…
If you’re not playing close attention to the track, you might understand why people felt this way.
It’s one of those songs where the music doesn’t quite reflect the darker lyrics.
So, if you don’t think so deeply about the lyrics, you can understand why people would think it’s an innocent love ballad…
However, there is a completely different interpretation that I haven’t mentioned yet. The idea that it isn’t a love song - twisted or not - at all, and it's actually about state surveillance and ‘big brother’.
Sociologist Gary T. Marx, who specialised in surveillance studies, argued that the song:
"nicely captures elements of the new surveillance"
He argued that the song, intentionally or not, is a reflection of a high surveillance society. Spooky stuff.
Hard to tell whether that was on Sting’s mind when he wrote it - although Sting does reference the idea of ‘surveillance’ as an inspiration.
Now, Sting later wrote a response to Every Breath - the not so subtly titled If You Love Somebody Set Them Free a couple years later. I guess it was his way of shaking off the stalker connotations…
Sting told the Guardian in 2026:
“I had to write the antidote after I’d poisoned people with this horrible thing.”
The Police had broken up in 1984, after their tour for Synchronicity. All of the problems that had been present in the recording process had remained throughout that tour; the arguments, particularly between Sting and Copeland got so bad that they simply couldn’t continue. I’m just grateful they managed to keep it together long enough to release Synchronicity.
Every Breath You Take came from a place of pain and darkness, and unfortunately for the band it continued to create more of that many years later.
In 2025, both Stewart Copeland and Andy Summers sued sting and his publishing company claiming they were owed between $2m $10.75m in royalties for hit songs including Every Breath.
In January 2026, Sting paid over $800,000 and as of now the case is ongoing.
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